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Whether you're dating someone new or just really want to give passionate oral sex to your current partner, everybody—and every vagina—is different. What pleased a partner may not work for your current sexual interest, and you may find yourself wondering whether there are other techniques out there that you're missing.
We spoke with certified sex therapist Holly Richmond, Ph. With over two dozen techniques, we're sure one of these will help you do the trick. For many women, orgasming is physical and mental; they need to feel relaxed and in the mood. Begin by making out and exploring other areas first," she says, such as:. The breasts and nipples are very sensitive, and beginning by lighting stroking, circling, or licking the nipples, or gently cupping the breasts, can really turn your partner on.
As you begin heading down, build up the anticipation by nibbling or licking their inner thigh, Richmond recommends. Feel free to explore other areas with your mouth or hands as well, like the neck, stomach, and butt. Stroke the vulva or clit with underwear still on. Again, you're building anticipation—you could even pull their underwear to the side when you're ready for contact.
Try running your tongue up and down with underwear still on, or using your breath to warm up the whole area. Never forget it. Starting off, it's a good idea to go slow. Dance around the clit with your tongue, or lightly graze it to start building sensation. Listen to and feel your partner respond as you lick their clit either up and down or side to side. You should be able to tell which they prefer, and it never hurts to ask if they like it!
Some like this and some don't, but you can try lightly sucking on the clit between strokes if they're into it. Along with up and down, and side to side, Engle says a figure-8, or infinity, motion can also work well. If your partner is clearly enjoying what you're doing, stay consistent as far as the movement and rhythm.
Constantly switching up techniques or speeds can make it harder for them to settle into the sensation. As the name suggests, another technique is to write the alphabet with your tongue around their clit. Lots of different letters equals lots of sensation. Plenty of people are just fine with solely clitoral stimulation while receiving, but others may prefer extra stimulation such as penetration, Richmond notes.
Here are some ideas to that end:. Don't forget about the lips! The labia both the inner and outer sets are sensitive too, and stimulating that area can offer a more all-encompassing sensation. To really expose the clit, don't be shy—spread the labia apart and your partner will feel everything a lot more intensely. Again, breasts and nipples are super sensitive—some folks orgasm from nipple play alone. If your partner likes to be penetrated during oral some don't, so ask! Lightly stroke the G-spot with your fingers in a curling motion while licking their clit.
Some people enjoy penetration from the tongue when getting head, but it doesn't offer as much stimulation as licking the clit, for example. See how they respond, and if they like it, alternate between the clit and vagina with your tongue.
Some people enjoy anal stimulation while receiving head, whether through your fingers or mouth. Again, always remember to get consent, and make sure you know what their hygiene preferences are as well. Taking a test run in the shower is a good place to start if you're squeamish. Here's our shower sex guide for inspo. Sex toys don't just have to be for solo fun, and they can be a great addition to a healthy sex life with your partner. Plus, the options are endless based on what you and your partner like.
Think vibrators, butt plugs, nipple clamps—whatever you're into, really. If you and your partner are both down for a cinematic experience, watching oral sex porn can add a little extra spice and inspiration to the experience. Depending on how long it takes them to orgasm , switching up positions can be a good way to stimulate different areas and create different sensations. Here are a handful to try:. The Kivin method involves the receiving partner lying on their back, and the other giving head from the side, so they're perpendicular to their partner's body. Here's a visual. This position offers a new angle, more vulva stimulation, and the potential to reach more sensitive spots.
From a doggy-style-like position, give them head from behind. This position is also great if your partner is into rimming, as well. A dental dam might be a good investment if you're new to this. A go-to position for many, this one offers a good angle for the giver, plus lots of access to the rest of the receiver's body--like grabbing breasts or their butt. To turn up the heat, throw out a "sit on my face" when you initially start hooking up, or whenever you want to change positions. Here's our dirty talk guide for more inspo. Giving head on your knees might seem like something more traditionally associated with blowjobs, but it can be hot for pretty much anyone.
Remember to spread the labia here for more clitoral exposure. Have the receiving partner sit in a chair. Bonus points if it's somewhere out of the ordinary, like the kitchen table or a living room chair. With their legs draped over the sides of the chair, you've got easy access from below.
Put a pillows underneath their hips. Using a pillow to tilt their hips upward slightly can allow their legs to open just a bit more, and also expose more of the anus. According to Engle, it's important to make sure your partner knows how much you want to give oral sex. Some people don't enjoy oral because they can't get out of their head, when a little reassurance is all they might need.
A relaxed woman is one more likely to experience an orgasm! Be open about how hot you find your partner and how good they taste. Moan into their vulva, making sure they know you're into it. You can also periodically look up at your partner and make eye contact, keeping that connection throughout the experience. If they reach orgasm, keep going—gently! The clitoris may be too sensitive for direct contact right away, so start by kissing the thighs, perhaps teasing the labia, and after a few minutes, then go back to the clitoris, Engle explains. If there's one thing Richmond and Engle both stress, it's that every clit is different, and it takes healthy communication to figure out what you both like in bed.
So, don't be afraid to ask what they want you to do to them, Engle says. If they aren't sure, there's plenty of room for experimentation. And of course, once you're underway, pay attention to physical and verbal cues. And you can always ask! Want your passion for wellness to change the world?
Become A Functional Nutrition Coach! Enroll today to our upcoming live office hours. Our FREE doctor-approved gut health guide. You are now subscribed Be on the lookout for a welcome in your inbox! Main . Try These 29 Oral Sex Techniques. Log in Profile. Saved Articles. Contact Support. Log Out. Your cart is empty. Our online classes and training programs allow you to learn from experts from anywhere in the world. Explore Classes. Expert review by Kristie Overstreet, Ph. Kristie Overstreet, Ph. She is a d counselor in California, Florida, Georgia, and Louisiana. She is also a certified sex therapist, certified addiction professional, and president of the Therapy Department, a private practice in Orange County that provides counseling services throughout the United States.
November 19, For creating anticipation. Keep the underwear on. Use your breath and tongue. For clitoral stimulation. Dance around it with the tongue. Lick it up and down or side to side. Try sucking on it. Move your tongue in a figure-8 motion. Stay consistent. Try the alphabet method. For extra stimulation. Kiss or lick the labia. Spread the labia. Grab a breast. Try putting a finger or two in. See if they like tongue penetration.
Play around with their butt, if they're into that. Incorporate toys. Try watching porn. Oral sex positions. The Kivin method. Oral sex from behind. Sitting on your face. Oral on your knees. Sitting down oral. The pillow method. Extra tips:. Encouragement is key. Tell them they taste good. Make noise.
Go for multiple orgasms.Oral sex for the ladies
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